A table of nine players.
Myself and eight others.
All nine players are in my way.
Bicycle Races : Poker Games.
I know that my legs are stronger than anyone else in this race. I know that I’m a better bike handler than anyone else in this race.
Statistically, I should win.
I have $1000 for three (3) races this weekend in which I’ve invested $333.33 per race against complete amateurs.
If I stay safe,pick my spots carefully and race like a seasoned racer — I’ll should win.
If I get too close to the back wheel of an amateur who doesn’t know what they’re doing — I could get my front wheel clipped and crash hard… injured to the point where I can’t continue for the next two races.
It’s best to give up that stage of the race and pick a better spot to win on the next stage or the race — when the ‘wheel-clipper’ is at the back of the peleton. .
I know that I’m better than everyone else in this game. I know that I have more patience than everyone else in this game.
I have $1000 for three (3) games this weekend in which I’ve invested $333.33 per game against idiots.
If I stay safe and play like a seasoned player — I’ll should win.
If I start calling-down an amateur who is trying to prove themselves — I could get my whole stack taken.
It’s best to fold and take advantage of their bravado the next hand.
Interviewer: “What is your greatest weakness?”
Interviewer: “Dignity? I don’t think dignity is a weakness.”
Applicant: “My greatest weakness is that I can’t bring myself to work for a company which hires HR people who would ask such an amateur question in a professional interview.”
Applicant: “I’ll show myself out now.”
I acted in a redditor-made short film a couple weekends ago. It was really fun and it looks like it’s going to turn out great. Here’s the official trailer.
The film is being released on Oct. 24th at HesWatchingYou.com. It’s totally free.
One of the managers at my office is a recent ex-Israeli Military. As such he could snap my head off with his little finger. He speaks basically zero English. He’s a very aggressive guy.
He asked if he could use my computer while I went to lunch. “Of course, no problem.”
I came back from lunch and there was a window opened to a website for Physical Fitness. Like, a ‘find an activity partner’ type of website.
In the interest of making conversation, I asked the guy, “Oh, cool. What kind of activities are you into?”
He responded, “Is bananas!”
Me: “I’m sorry. Say again, please?”
Him: “Is bananas! You know! B-A-N-A-N-A-S! Is bananas!”
Me: “Oh, yeah. I totally know. Right on, man.”
I totally don’t know.
UPDATE: I think I just figured it out! Perhaps he was saying that he likes anything which is extreme — like rock climbing, sky diving, etc. He was trying to relay it me with song lyrics because he didn’t know how to say it in English any other way.
People’s brains are awesome.
I should preface this by stating that I’m no stranger to sketchy neighborhoods. It takes a lot to make me jump.
So, I was walking through the South Bronx the other day when I was scared shitless by a sound which made me the think the sky was cracking open or Jesus was coming back or something like that.
Turns out it was some guy test driving a Lamborghini in the industrial zone of The Bronx. He flew right by me at who-knows-what speed and drifted around the next corner. You could still hear the engine after he was very, very far away.
Note to self: Buy a Lamborghini
To further detail how out of touch the entertainment industry is: I linked a YouTube video of Adele’s performance at The Grammy’s (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uVQ0GKhYZU) but it has been taken down from YouTube due to a copyright claim by The Grammy’s.
You must be kidding me! Wow, not seeing the forest for the trees, much, Grammy’s? I’m giving free publicity to CBS, The Grammy’s, XL/Columbia Records and Adele.
It’s called a “loss leader” — perhaps you’d heard of it while getting your MBA. And you take down the video because you think you’re losing money by people not going here instead http://www.cbs.com/shows/grammys/video/– except you don’t have the indexing or crowd sourcing power which does YouTube, and your online broadcast content is simply terrible!
This is a great example of why SOPA, PIPA and *ACTA* are death sentences for the internet as we know it — and also our best available free exchange of information.
Sorry, I’m actually mad now.
P.S. I just realized that this is my 150th post on this blog. So, yeah.