(This post is a serendipitous third installment of the “The Mace, The Axe and The Crowbar: A Love Story” series. If you are not familiar with the story, read it jerk. Everyone in the world thinks it is a great read.)
In hopes of making a long story short:
The former love of my life –the girl who the Mace/Axe/Crowbar story is about– has contacted me after finding the aformentioned story on this blog.)
A few days ago, I was hanging out with my fabulous girlfriend in my bedroom as usual. She was watching America’s Next Runway Nanny Factor, or some stupid shit. I was buried in my laptop sending long overdue replies to millions of e-mails.
Then I saw an e-mail from –the girl from the story–. I hadn’t spoken to her in more than seven years.
My heart started beating ninety miles an hour and I started sweating.
I must have looked wicked guilty.
From across the room, my girlfriend whipped her head around to look at me in the most accusatory and condescending manner I can possibly imagine. The following conversation commenced:
Girlfriend: What are you doing?
Boyfriend: Nothing really, same shit.
Girlfriend: Really? Do I need to come over there and look for myself?
Boyfriend: What? No. There’s someone I used to know, and…[interrupted]
Girlfriend: She must have been really special!
[a pause you could drive a truck through]
Boyfriend: What? Well, yeah, but…
Girlfriend: How far away does she live?
Girlfriend: HOW FAR AWAY DOES SHE LIVE?!
Boyfriend: Very very far away.
Girlfriend: Okay, go ahead.
Filed under: boyfriend and girlfriend |