Girlfriend: Where is my black pillow?
Me: The flat one?
Me: I’m using it for my mouse-pad now. I commandeered it.
Me: I commandeered your pillow.
Girlfriend: What is that supposed to mean?
Me: I’m not really sure, but in legal terms, I think it pretty much means that I just straight-up took your pillow and unless you have the proper means in place to take it back, then you’re totally screwed.
Girlfriend: Well then how do I commandeer my pillow back?
Me: I don’t know. I haven’t read that part yet but you might consider hiring a lawyer.
Girlfriend: You are such a jerk.
I’d like to nominate myself for “Best Headline Ever”.
“Endearing Commandeering”. Great premise for a song if I do say so myself.
Take it and run with it, Mr. Sondheim. I demand royalties. Call me.
*Nobody better steal my idea because, legally speaking, I’m pretty sure I will commandeer you.
Seriously, though… I heard Stephen Sondheim ties kids up in his basement and does weird things to them. No shit.
Filed under: nyc |